Popeye turned to Olive Oyl and said: "Well blow me down!

Because so many comic heroes live in this old town -

I wonder why you hang around with this old sailor man?

I have no super powers, just a silly spinach can..."

Olive thought for half a tick then kissed him on the cheek,

"Sure, Superman can fly and has a face carved out of teak,

but he can see through anything - I find that rather crude,

cause every time he'd look at me I'd feel like I was nude!

"That Batman is adept at scaling walls and driving cars,

apparently he's really strong when bending iron bars,

and Robin throws a batarang just like a deadly dart -

but they would be no good at all, if forced to work apart?

"Now Spiderman can shoot a web and doesn't need a gun,

he swings like Tarzan through the town, and doesn't have to run,

protecting all the public every day and through the night -

but would a girl survive it if he gave her neck a bite?

"The Hulk is huge, and very strong, and throws his weight around,

but how could he say loving things with that big grunting sound?

That Aquaman can talk to fish, send pirates off to jails,

but what girl wants to hug a guy whose skin's adorned with scales?

"A cape is rather sissy and a mask is wrong, somehow,

and special belts with gadgets are on sale in toy stores now,

a lycra suit is for the gym - not for the world to see,

and undies on the outside doesn't do a thing for me!

"A woman needs a caring man who'll giver her little ones,

and not some he-man smiling grim and making witty puns,

so you'll do me, my Popeye, handsome super hero? No -

but down that spinach, darling, it makes every muscle grow!"

more of my FUNNY POEMS here