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A drunken pirate
staggered through the doorway of a bar,
he yelled for ale,
and then began to sing:
"My Treasure
Island's wall to wall with gold and riches, aaarrggh!
I dream of all the
pleasure it will bring!"
The crowd all
laughed at Pirate Pete, a tale they'd heard before,
this pirate was a
joke, a drunken dog;
he always sung of
shipwreck on a gold-infested shore,
then drifting back
to safety on a log.
A Londoner, a
stranger, pricked his ears to hear the tale,
he waited till the
pirate stopped to scratch,
then sat down
right beside him with a flagon full of ale,
he poured two
tankards, looked him in the patch.
"You know the
briny backwards, sailed to seven seas and back?
Seen treasure of
the kind that makes men weep?
I'll help you find
your treasure, man, if funds are all you lack"
but sadly, Pete
the Pirate was asleep.
The stranger shook
him roughly, "Don't you want to hear my deal?"
The pirate opened
up his one good eye,
"Nobody here" he
slurred "believes my Treasure Island's real"
"There's one who
does," the stranger said "'tis I!"
"Tis far too late
for me" the pirate grinned with toothy gap,
"'twould need a
man with money and a ship,
a man with pluck
to follow this here buried treasure map"
a faded parchment
there within his grip.
"I have a ship,
she's riding here at anchor, fit to sail,
she's old but
fast, with many vessels worse;
now let me see
your map and let me pour another ale"
the pirate
answered: "Let me see your purse."
The sun was hot
and glaring and the pirate blinked his eyes,
its angle told a
time of way past noon;
remembering the
stranger who believed his drunken lies,
and given him a
shiny gold doubloon.
A whole doubloon!
He grinned, this year there'd be no need to beg,
'twas ages since
he'd seen this princely sum,
he tried to click
his heels - a clever stunt - with wooden leg
then headed for
the tavern and some rum.
"Pour drinks for
all me mateys!" as he slumped upon a stool,
"Good on you,
Pete" the barman said aloud,
"You sold another
useless map, you found another fool"
"Ha Haaaarrggh"
said Pete "there's one in every crowd!"
more of my
FUNNY POEMS here
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